Memoir of a Web Junkie…

So I’ve been without my computer for two days and it’s starting to drive me a little batty. I’ve become less addicted to my computer over the years, which is a good thing. I remember when I first started this internet thing. I was on my computer 20 hours out of the day, not kidding… seriously. There was so much to discover and learn that I was hooked on the rush of exploring new territory. It was amazing. But alas, the internet is not shiny and new to me anymore. I’ve been in the game too long and it’s lost its luster. I still occasionally get a little high every now and then when I figure out html code that has been killing me slowly or I discover a service, website or php program that will downgrade my life from the 9th circle of hell to the 7th. It’s good, but that first feeling… that first taste… like heroin… you’ll never get that level of high again. Makes me kinda sad.

So yeah, my computer situation has kinda changed. Like a creepy old man with ESP, my uncle called me last night wanting to talk computer upgrades. I have plans to go over his house this weekend and get a new machine with much more speed than what I’ve got now. I’m excited, but I’ve also decided to buy a new computer from Dell. I’ve already picked out the one I want. Isn’t it gorgeous? Do you know how much damage I could do with a TV tuner and recording/clipping technology? I swear the world would implode. That is how crazy it would be. Just thinking about it makes me want to laugh like a Comic book Villain. It’s upwards of a thousand dollars but I want it… really, really bad.

I passed the idea of purchasing a New, new computer by my mother and she pitched a fucking fit. She did the same thing with my sister’s new car. “We can’t afford it; we can barely pay the bills we have.” Which is disturbingly true, but it is hard to take on the burden of three adults on two adult’s salaries. My sister and I not only share the burden of household bills; we also share the feeling of working really hard and getting nothing for it. 80 % of the reason you work is the keep a roof over your head and food in you belly, yes, but the other 20% is to purchase things that bring you joy. Yeah, we see very little of that. It’s almost like we are working for free. And the parental unit doesn’t help the situation by shaming us every time we want to buy something we’ve been dreaming about. I will go as far as to say my computer is my life. I spend more time on it doing things and connecting with people than I do in real life. That may not be healthy, but it’s true. The logical course of things would be, if my computer has become a piece of shit, to want a new one. Right? I suppose it is true that I have champagne taste on beer money and always go for the most expensive thing on the menu. I guess it’s just the Leo in me, but damn it, I know quality when I see it. I’m not going to spend my money on crap just because it’s cheaper. If I’m going to spend money at all, it’s going to do what I want it to do and be damned good at it too! I guess I’ll write a spell about it. It will come to me. I just need to find the means to get it.

Peace, love and blessed it be.