Fucked Up...

Hi *waves*. Well, it's about time I tell you guys what is going on with me. I haven't had time to write as things have been pretty freakin' weird in my life lately. Most of the reason why I haven't posted as regularly as I should is because I've been without internet access. My Verizon DSL went out on me and Verizon refused to send me a new modem, so I've been without my only connection to the outside world for almost two months. I finally broke down and ordered DSL from Earthlink and I'm pretty happy with it so far. It's much, much faster than Verizon. At first I thought my last connection was slow because of my computer. Turns out it was my shitty provider... go figure.

So, I am trying to get back on track. Yes, yes I know. How many times have you guys heard me say that? But I mean it. Well shit, I mean it every time I say it, but you know how it is. Sometimes I just can't keep the commitment no matter how hard I try.

Anyway, I still have grand plans for my little corner of the web. I have a layout that I was working on about a month ago. Who knows if I'm going to still feel it after so much time offline. In all honesty, I could have worked on it and coded the damned thing while I was banned from the net, but there is something very depressing about my computer when I don't have internet access. I didn't even what to sit in front of the thing. It felt incomplete some how.

So yes, Tiffany hasn't disappeared off the face of the earth. I'm still here trying to make something of this domain. You know that whole make yourself deal. I'm hoping that getting my shit in order here will help accomplish that task. I think I've lost touch with myself by not keeping current with things that are important to me. This domain is still important to me, so I need to show some love.

Oh and before I forget, my birthday was on the 14th. I turned 26 and was planning on doing my usual "today is my birthday and I've still done nothing with my life" post, but it didn't happen this year. I got really depressed and just couldn't bring myself to write anything. In fact I just wanted to pretend like I didn't have a birthday. I don't know if that is a bad sign, but I just wasn't feeling it. Maybe it was because everyone forgot about it or that I didn't get any presents except what I bought for myself... I think 2006 is just a bad year for me. Nothing has gone right. All these bad things keep happening to me. I don't know why or what I'm doing wrong. There must be a lesson to learn, but I can't seem to see it...

I hope that working on the domain and helping getting Jackie back online will help me get out of this funk. I don't plan to be this fucked up come 2007.